All posts tagged: friendship

The Reliants Project: 3 months

Published by ericaeyoung

Hard to believe that I’ve already been in London for 3 months! Thanks to all of you who have shown interest in participating in The Reliants Project. If you haven’t already, you can read more about this personal project in my previous post. If you’re just learning about the project and interested in tracking your connections, reach out to our community through this typeform. reliant   /re·li·ant/   noun. 1. a British car manufacturer. 2. a person on which someone depends.At this point I’m trying to focus on the connections made outside of work, so I am not including colleagues in the statistics or visualisation unless they’ve had a direct impact on my meeting others beyond the office. While it’s still early days, here are some basic statistics thus far: Existing local network: 13 (not work colleagues) Events attended: 11 (3 work-related) Organisations joined: 2 (1 fitness-related, 1 hobby-related) New connections made: 25 (individuals that I’ve had regular contact with since meeting, also not work colleagues) Existing network that has moved to London: 2 Existing network that has left London: 2 New reliants: …

The Reliants Project: how adults make friends they can rely on

Published by ericaeyoung

Turns out we want to talk about friendships. Thanks to those of you who reached out to me personally in response to my earlier blog post. I’m also excited to see the dialogue around building and maintaining friendships as adults has since expanded beyond a handful of forward-thinking blogs. Articles have popped up in The Atlantic, The Huffington Post, The New York Times and Vox acknowledging the challenge of adult friendship as well as analysing the systems that may be counterproductive (such as urban planning). Here are a handful of my favourites: How Friendships Change in Adulthood How our housing choices make adult friendships more difficult How To Make Friends As An Adult In 4 Simple Steps Dorms for Grownups: A Solution for Lonely Millennials? Friends of a Certain Age The Limits of Friendship Having just moved to a new city, I am acutely aware of this trend and have been actively thinking about ways to better understand this dynamic. A wise friend suggested that I focus on the myths we tell ourselves about making friends, which are easy to find in …

The building blocks of trust

Published by ericaeyoung

Yesterday I launched a fundraiser for the extended Tamang family in Thulo Syabru, Nepal on You Caring and sent it out through my social network. Amazingly, the campaign has raised 30% of the goal in 24 hours and we owe a massive thank you to everyone who has contributed so far. Several people reached out in response to the donation request with questions like, “how can you ensure that the funds are delivered successfully to the intended recipient?” or “how will you know that the funds are used responsibly?”. These are issues that I myself have struggled with and have discouraged me from donating money in the past. The most valuable advice I received while preparing the fundraising campaign was: “if you trust the people, give freely and without expectations…everyone is trying to balance to desire to help directly and the responsibility to help in an accountable manner. It’s not an easy thing to accomplish, but I would start small and focus on who and what you know best.”It just so happens that I’m currently reading The Speed of Trust …

Why don’t we discuss making adult friends?

Published by ericaeyoung

Recently I’ve been thinking a lot about adult friendships. Why the adults I know have so few friends, particularly if they are in a relationship or have kids. Why there is such a gap between their social network size and the number of people they actually consider confidants. Why there are so many well-developed tools for finding jobs and partners, but not friendship. My search for answers began by diving into academic research on social networks.To provide some context, a global social network is often subdivided into several circles when discussed academically: acquaintances, co-workers, friendship, personal, and family. It’s well documented that social networks and the emotional support that they provide are as valuable as sleep, eating well and exercise for long term health and wellness. The personal network is the subset of the global network that provides this essential support. Practically speaking, these are the people you reach out to when you have important news to share, serious decisions to make, or need to ask for help. Needless to say, these are the relationships you want to build and maintain as an adult. Above and beyond …

Nurturing connections to form lasting friendships

Published by ericaeyoung

Two years ago, I joined a Hong Kong Science Park delegation to participate in a Geneva exhibition. While there, I met a Sri Lankan professor who radiated energy like an elastic band pulled taught and his appearance further reinforced this visual. He personifies everything I’ve come to feel about Sri Lanka: genuine, inquisitive and bubbling over with enthusiasm about the country’s future. Serendipitously, my Airbnb hosts were a warm Sri Lankan family, who also welcomed him into their home. This gave us the opportunity to build a foundation for friendship. We celebrated Sri Lankan new year together, which is where I got my first taste of both the food and culture.This wonderful experience stuck with me. Last November I applied and was accepted to a Vipassana meditation course in Kandy, Sri Lanka. Afterwards, I had the chance to reunite with that professor. When I told him about my meditation experience, he immediately called his close friend and shared my recent experience. Without hesitation, this stranger graciously offered me free accommodation at a retreat he had designed and built in …